Tuesday Random 5: My House Stinks

1. I mentioned last week I was watching Elementary. I was also reading The Last of August, a Sherlock Holmes inspired novel. I may have been overdoing it on the Sherlock, if such a thing is possible. If I suddenly express an interest in going into private investigation as a second career, you may need to talk me off that ledge, Fellow Adventurers.

2. I’m pretty non-confrontational for the most part. I try to go with the flow. If I get the wrong order in a restaurant, unless it’s something I just don’t care for, I’ll usually take it anyway. Last week, I’d had enough. Amazon Prime only sort of applies in Hawaii. It’s supposed to be 3-5 day shipping. Lately, it’s been taking two weeks or more. I was starting to get a little salty. Then, a book I wanted to read in time for book club showed an arrival date of over two weeks after I ordered. Nope. I went into their live chat to express my displeasure to customer service. In the end, I got a free month of Prime and a promise this wouldn’t happen again, which I took a screenshot of, because it will. Regardless, score one for not sitting back and putting up with less than I paid for.

3. Arthur Dent is trying to drive me to an early grave. Last week at Taekwondo, he decided to climb over the back of the bleachers that are at the gym. He fell off the back, slightly scraping his leg. After class, he was sitting backward on the bottom bleacher and fell over backwards onto the concrete, scraping his back and putting a lump the size of a golfball on the back of his head. I was afraid he gave himself a concussion. I even consulted a friend and fellow Kansan who happens to be a nurse. Luckily, he’s fine. Don’t worry, he didn’t learn anything from his experience. He was climbing on the bleachers last night, despite my nearly coming unglued. Climb on, Arthur Dent. Climb on.

4. I noticed a commercial for a remake of Flatliners last night. Is there no 80’s or 90’s movie they won’t remake?

5. I’m having trouble concentrating. I let Amelia Earhart make kalua pig in the crock pot. It’s basically Hawaiian smoked pork. Now my whole house smells like pork, which is a winner for some people, but is absolutely nausea inducing for me. I didn’t think it would smell like this or I wouldn’t have let her do it. Anyway, I have to go smell a candle or put some Vick’s under my nose or something.

Tuesday Random 5: Of Sherlock and More Sherlock

My house is in post Costco shopping chaos. It’s time to fix dinner. But I have things to say. I’m going to step over the box of goldfish and the case of microwave popcorn (I’m tired. The International Man of Intrigue is deployed. I’m feeling accomplished there isn’t a case of Snickers to step over.) and feed my Little Explorers chicken nuggets and write the things.

1. Today, I had a morning. I messaged my friends things all morning like, “I’m killing it!” and “Totally winning at life today!” Most days, I have a timeline for the things I need to do. I give myself generous windows, because life has taught me that things always come up. Today I had a million and five things to do. I planned that most of them would be a stretch to get done before I had to pick the Little Explorers up, and I’d have a car full of groceries and Little Explorers by 1p.m. Instead, things fell into place. It was like I had one of those time turner things from Harry Potter. I snuck little errands in between bigger errands that suddenly had larger gaps between them than usual. I even had time to run home and unload the groceries and put the cold things away, but not the dry goods- see introduction. It was magical. Laura Ingalls Wilder even fell asleep in the car, so I parked in carline at school early and had 30 minutes to read. Bliss.

2. Good thing it was bliss because then it all fell apart. Two of three Little Explorers in the car were already screaming at each other and threatening bodily harm before they were even buckled in. My package came from Gap. One used and ripped and reeking of perfume skirt. Funny. I don’t remember Gap offering used clothing online. My two best friends and lots of other people I love posting pictures from the U2 concert in Kansas City. Someone on a Facebook page said something mean about a group of people and it made me sad and mad because the Facebook page should be full of people that are kind and loving. Then I got sad. I felt sorry for myself for not being in KC. I felt angry that I can’t change people’s minds, and angry at myself for arguing with someone on the internet. We all know how stupid that is, Fellow Adventurers. I looked around at the chaos piled everywhere in my house and I got overwhelmed. I thought, “Why couldn’t the day continue to be awesome.” Then I remembered something a friend who was struggling with negativity said. I decided to try it. Instead of saying, “Why couldn’t the day continue to be awesome,” I said, “I’m so glad I had such an awesome morning so I can let all this little crap this afternoon roll off my back.” You know what, it worked. I’m happy that my friends are at U2, even if I can’t be, because they’ll take pictures and send them to me and I know they miss me. I’m going to feed my Little Explorers and clean up the kitchen, and put them to bed early for extra quiet reading time. I can still get my workout in and I’m sure to sleep well tonight. 

3. So, it turns out it’s been a couple of hours since I wrote #2. A neighbor walked over to talk for a few minutes and then I made the Little Explorers clean up. The house is still pretty chaotic, but I don’t have to step over any goldfish. The workout is done, too, and I’m watching Elementary. I’ve only watched the first several episodes, but I think i’ll enjoy it and stick with it. I don’t like it as well as the BBC Sherlock, but Elementary does have that it puts out more than three episodes every two years going for it. Also, I’m obsessed with Lucy Liu’s eyelashes. I’m pretty sure they're extensions. What are you watching, Fellow Adventurers?

4. Reading anything enjoyable? I’m reading an as yet unpublished book by a friend. It’s brilliant and amazing and I hope it gets published someday. Next up is to finish The Last of August, yet another riff on Sherlock Holmes. This is the second in a trilogy by Brittany Cavallaro. After that, or maybe before, depending on when Amazon Prime feels like delivering to Hawaii, is Moloka’i by Alan Brenner. (The two day Amazon Prime shipping doesn't apply here. The 3-5 days they promise is a FAKE LIE, too, but that's a separate rant.) Moloka'i is for book club, hence the pause on everything else.

5. I just realized I picked at dinner. It’s now almost 9 pm and I’m starving. To have a snack or not to have a snack? That is the question. The answer is probably no, but I’m going to go to bed and read so it stays no. Peace out, Fellow Adventurers.